Notices

1. I've never seen or read John Ford's play "'Tis Pity She's a Whore" [published in 1633] -- I know that it is about incest, but I've just borrowed the title, as I loved it.

2. This play discloses something about the past lives of John and Jane, the protagonists of other series of mine ("The Toy Salespeople" and "The Astarte Nunnery").

Dramatis Personae (in alphabetical order)

- Jane

- John

- Sarah, John's mother

- Tamar, Jane's mother

STAGE SETTING

This is an one-act play, whose stage setting remains the same throughout the show.

The events take place at the Pick Up, a fashionable restaurant which features some closets for clandestine encounters.

In the foreground there is a dining table with four chairs; in the background you will see two closets, with a king size bed each, the door to the bathroom, and other furniture as befits the director's fantasy.

The closets are separated by a wall, and the characters in each aren't supposed to hear what the characters in the other are saying.

A technician is supposed to light up either the table or the closets, according to the action on-stage.

SCENE 01

(At the dining table, while drinking coffee.)

TAMAR: As usual, this restaurant serves excellent food. I couldn't settle with anything less for my daughter's birthday -- and neither you for your son's.

SARAH: And, while here, some customers have noticed our figures and asked for a rendezvous through the waitress. So, we haven't lost time either :-)

TAMAR: You're right, but you shouldn't have reminded us and our children that we are harlots. Today is a day of rejoicing, not just of enjoyment.

SARAH: You're right. By the way, it's now time that we listen to our children's wildest desires to be fulfilled within a year. Now they're both eighteen, they can ask whatever.

TAMAR: I've booked two closets, one for you and one for us, for the sake of privacy. Let's go there.

SCENE 02

(The left closet has been allotted to Sarah and John, while the right one to Tamar and Jane.)

SARAH: Dear John, what is your wildest desire now?

JOHN: Mom, I just want you.

SARAH: Me? What do you mean?

JOHN: To do to me what you do to your clients, mom.

SARAH: John, I can't let you come back to where you've come from. I can't meet this desire.

JOHN: I think that your profession has somewhat compromised my sex life, mom.

SARAH: John, women do mind your profession, not your mother's while evaluating you. I'm sorry to say that you aren't an Adonis, so the only way to overcome this disadvantage is to become a highly regarded (and rich) professional.

Having sex with me won't help you become a man women love. I can help you with a lot of things, but not with that.

JOHN: So, mom, am I the only man you've turned down?

SARAH: John, you know that I can afford to be fussy and reject the clients I dislike. The problem is that sex between us is a no-no. Please, ask me something else.

(across the wall)

TAMAR: Darling, what's your desire?

JANE: You. Do you prefer to eat me first, or me to eat you?

TAMAR: Jane! What are you telling me?!?

JANE: Mom, even though I've never told you before, you know that I'm lesbian. But in this backward city finding a partner is exceedingly difficult. So I have no choice.

TAMAR: Jane, not only did I know that, but also consulted several psychologists in order to know whether my own lesbianism might have made you lesbian too -- but they've invariably answered that there is no reason to think that.

JANE: I've known about your orientation for a long time; that's why I've made so bold and so blunt a request of you.

TAMAR: Dear Jane, even though I am a prostitute by profession, I can't go to bed with whoever asks it. I have to be fussy, and turn down requests like yours, which are incestuous.

JANE: I'm sure that had I been Sarah's daughter, she would have assented out of sheer love!

TAMAR: Ha Ha Ha Ha! Darling, I've known Sarah for much more time than you, and I'm certain that you've just said nonsense. You simply have to ask me something else -- I can't go to bed with you.

JANE: Ok, mom. But the problem remains. By the way, I've always wondered how could a lesbian like you go to bed with several men each week.

TAMAR: Don't say anyone, but being lesbian doesn't mean being utterly unable to get aroused by a man, or being unable to enjoy orgasm with him. At times I enjoy it, although I have to conceal that, and this makes my job more palatable.

JANE: I asked that because I have at times fantasies in which men carnally know me, and I feel excited by them -- so I wonder whether I could settle with marrying a man in spite of my sexual orientation.

TAMAR: I advise you against that. Perhaps the best present I can give you is to help you discover your life goals; if you complain that you're unable to find a sex partner here, you can move, but if your life goals are still uncertain, moving wouldn't help you.

JANE: You're right, mom.

(across the wall)

SARAH: John, today you told me that you loved being around Jane and Tamar. Could you please be more specific?

JOHN: Tamar's tits are huge; I often wondered which was her bra size.

SARAH: 40G. My ones are 36E.

JOHN: How about Jane?

SARAH: She is about 36F. Does she have more strengths in your eyes?

JOHN: She is clever, sings well, plays the piano masterfully, knows Hebrew and a host of computer languages. While most women feel awed when they meet me, she has always behaved naturally towards me, and I've always felt that I could be everything for her.

SARAH: Jane is apparently lesbian, so you and her will never be more than friends; and your inordinate desire shows that it isn't enough for you. Had Jane been another woman, I would have advised you against meeting her again, as having such friendships is the most effective way to remain bachelor for life.

JOHN: How about Tamar?

SARAH: I should talk to her. In principle, sex between you is not incest. But ... you should know that we (me and Tamar) have often fantasized about seeing you and Jane married together. If our desire comes true, having had sex with her mother would put you all in a terrible predicament.

JOHN: Why?

SARAH: Is it your fantasy to nail both mother and daughter? Only men with this fantasy don't understand the gravity of the biblical prohibition against it.

JOHN: Yes. Having both Tamar and Jane would make me the happiest man on earth.

SARAH: Yet an inordinate desire, but a desire I can help you fulfill.

(across the wall)

JANE: Mom, are there some colleagues of yours who could have sex with me, who would perhaps prefer having a female than a male client?

TAMAR: Other lesbian prostitutes, no. But I know one who doesn't decline having lesbian sex, and I may talk to her.

JANE: Wonderful. Who is she?

TAMAR: Sarah, John's mother.

JANE: Really?

TAMAR: Really. She has often served me too. I think that it's the best solution for you.

JANE: John is somewhat jealous of her mother. How would he deal with that?

TAMAR: He acquiesces to his mom's being a prostitute, and he'll perhaps love your relationship with her. Men are usually jealous of other men, not of other women.

JANE: So I'll have a sex partner I sort of love.

TAMAR: Sarah is a good friend of you. If she assents, you'll be very happy with her.

(across the wall)

JOHN: I'm curious to know something about you, mom.

SARAH: Tell me.

JOHN: Is it true that you're still nursing?

SARAH: Yes, I do. Most of my clients love sucking my milk, and it gives me a competitive edge.

JOHN: Is your milk as sweet as I remember?

SARAH: You remember that? As I nursed you until you went to school, you may tell the truth. Ah! I understand! You're subtly asking me to let you taste it again!

JOHN: Yes, mom.

SARAH: I nursed you as a child, I can nurse you again. But only in small quantities, since I need it for my clients.

JOHN: That's ok, mom.

SARAH: Please, lie on the bed, put your head on my lap, and let me serve you. (across the wall)

JANE: I would like to know something about you, mom.

TAMAR: Do ask.

JANE: I think that you've never stopped producing milk, even after you weaned me, have you?

TAMAR: You're right. When I was nursing you I discovered that lots of men and not just a few women have a milk fetish, so I and Sarah kept our tits making milk.

JANE: Sarah too?

TAMAR: Yes. You'll probably love her milk. It's so sweet :-)

JANE: How about your milk, mom?

TAMAR: Your question is somewhat timely, since my breasts are getting engorged, and manual expression is of little help. So I have to ask you to relieve me -- and you'll be able to compare our milks.

JANE: I'm doing that in order to heal you, not with an erotic purpose.

TAMAR: Darling, I've nursed you as a child, I can nurse you again -- provided that you won't dry me up. Please, lie on the bed, put your head on my lap, and let me serve you.

(across the wall)

(Sarah unbuttons her shirt, removes her bra and hands her right nipple to John. He tightens his lips around it, tries to suck, but milk doesn't spurt.)

SARAH (chuckling): John, you've forgotten how to suckle! Let me teach. A good starting point is to massage the mamma, from the chest towards the nipple, in order to express the milk. Please, apply your mouth to the nipple while doing that, as milk may suddenly squirt.

(John does that, a few drops of milk go out of the nipple; he licks them first, then latches on and sucks.)

SARAH: Not just the nipple -- you have to grab the whole areola ... good, you're doing that right ... you've triggered the letdown reflex ... the milk pleasantly goes out ... your tongue is deft ... nobody has been able to stimulate me so well so far ... my womb is contracting, energetically but agreeably ... You're bringing me to orgasm!

(John stops for a while, troubled as if he had raped his mother.)

SARAH: Go on ... I knew that it could happen when I assented ... go on, I'll enjoy it. Ah ... ah ... ah ... more forcefully ... empty my breast ... I'm contracting my thigh muscles to heighten the sensation ...

(Sarah can't speak anymore, as her back arches and her voice ends up to moans, as it was a point of honor with John to completely empty and completely satisfy her mother.)

SARAH: Change breast, please.

(John does that, and while latching on he massages the breast.)

SARAH: You've learnt the trick. Good.

(Sarah's milk now fills John's mouth, and he keeps drawing more and more of it, until mom has to raise her miniskirt in order to rub her mound -- just contracting her thighs' muscles wasn't enough anymore.

John has raised a tent in his trousers, and when he has emptied Sarah's left breast, he opens his fly, draws his erect penis out and touches Sara's nipples with it, causing them to get erect and spurt some milk.)

SARAH: John, please, remove it. We mustn't do anything else. You've given me a orgasm I haven't had in ages, but ... I'm your mother, you're my son.

JOHN: Let me help you dress again.

SARAH: Ok, you can do that.

(John cleanses her breasts with a handkerchief, helps her to straighten her miniskirt, latch the bra and button her shirt up. )

JOHN: Ah ... for how much time have you hired the closet?

SARAH: For the whole night ... I thought that you were going to ask me to have sex with a gorgeous colleague of mine, and I have even brought the catalog.

JOHN: You're the best, mom. The catalog was unnecessary.

SARAH: You have to choose another woman as a sex partner. Think: had I had been just a friend of yours, our friendship would have been destroyed by our deed.

But I'm your mother, and I forgive and beg forgiveness. Think again: at least today, being my son has come to your advantage, not to your detriment.

(across the wall)

TAMAR: Jane, how long nipples do you have! They can be seen thru your sweater!

JANE: Let me show them to you!

(Jane removes the sweater, the shirt, the undershirt, the bra, and bares her gorgeous breasts and nipples. Tamar watches them pensively.)

TAMAR: It's strange ... may I suckle your nipples first, darling?

JANE (gleefully): Why not? Do help yourself, mom.

(Tamar nears to Jane's left breast, gently tickles her areola and nipple until it is fully erect, then latches on and starts. The stimulation is so sudden and powerful that Jane is struck dumb with pleasure -- the only thing she can do is "pedaling" in order to squeeze her pubic mound and moan.

After twenty minutes of extreme sucking, Tamar switches breast, brings Jane to orgasm again, and doesn't stop until her own milk trickles from her nipples.)

TAMAR: Your breasts are lovely, darling. Happy the person who will suck and fondle them!

JANE: I'm going to reciprocate ... but I won't be as deft as you.

TAMAR: Don't worry, darling. You only have to do as I did. Ah, I have to clear things up with you: your breasts seemed as if they were lactating, and I just wanted to check it.

JANE: I'm still a virgin ... I can prove that.

TAMAR: It's unnecessary ... I was just worried about your health. Now, do suck my tits ... they're nearly aching.

(Jane gently tickles her mom's left areola and nipple until it gets erect and some milk trickles out; then she latches on and begins to suck, gently at first, then ever more aggressively as her mom's breasts squirt more and more milk.

Tamar is ever more aroused by her daughter's suck, puts a hand on her own mound to massage it, but she reaches orgasm before touching it. Jane doesn't stop; she keeps sucking, relieving her mom from discomfort, pleasing her, leading her to orgasm again.)

TAMAR: Go on, darling ... you're the best suckling I've had in ages ... my tits haven't felt better for ages ... I'm coming again ... If I had a generator in my womb, it could supply electricity to the whole building.

(Jane doesn't stop sucking, but points at her wet crotch, then makes the OK gesture.)

TAMAR: You too are enjoying that? Good, darling, I'm still good at something. But my left breast is now empty ... stop sucking, or it will increase milk production, and no milk fetishism is scheduled until the day after tomorrow. Please, change breast.

JANE: Your milk is exceedingly tasty, mom. I'm sucking it with great pleasure.

(Then Jane latches on to the other breast, and completely empties it, driving mom insane with orgasms.

They are at last so tired that they have to lay on the bed; Jane hugs mom and kisses her in the cheeks; then latches to her mom's breasts, briefly sucks them again, then touches her mom's lips with her own.

Tamar understands what Jane is doing, cautiously opens her mouth, so Jane can fill it with her previously collected milk.)

TAMAR: I've often been told that my milk is tasty, but nobody had proved that to me until now. Thanks, Jane.

JANE: You're welcome, mom.

(Jane raises mom's legs over her own shoulders, and tries to grind her own mound over hers, but Tamar stops her.)

TAMAR: Please, don't do that. Hadn't I been your mom, I would gleefully have taught you scissoring, but it is something we just can't do together.

JANE: Ok, mom. So, let's dress up and rejoin Sarah and John.

TAMAR: Sarah will love you, but you know that you may not be just her client. You have to befriend her.

SCENE 03

(At the dining table.)

SARAH: Hi, Tamar. Has your daughter expressed her desire?

TAMAR: Sort of. But I would like to talk you in private.

SARAH: I agree. I too have something to say which is best told in confidence.

TAMAR: How about our sons? Should we bring them home?

SARAH: Why? They're adults now. We can talk in one of the closets we've hired, they may talk each other to sleep in the other.

JOHN: Thanks for your "trust", mom.

JANE: Don't bash your mother, John. I really have something to share with you, and tonight is the first night our moms aren't closely watching us.

SCENE 04

(John and Jane are in the left closet, Sarah and Tamar in the right one.)

TAMAR: Sarah, what has John asked you?

SARAH: Me. In his words, the catalog was unnecessary, as I was the best.

TAMAR: What have you done?

SARAH: As he had learned that I am still nursing, he settled with sucking my tits. And I have to say that he has learnt to do that masterfully.

TAMAR. I did the same with Jane. She wanted her mom too.

(across the wall)

JANE: Did your mom grant your wish?

JOHN: Do you take an oath of secrecy?

JANE: May a mammoth rape me with his tusks if I ever leak anything.

JOHN: And may a whale force me to a kiss her blowhole if I do the same.

JANE: My wish was ... my mother. She's lesbian like me, and I wanted to start my sex life with her.

JOHN: I too wished my mother had sex with me. We settled with sucking her milk.

JANE: Me too. I loved it. We loved it. Mom even sucked my breasts, and sent me to heaven.

JOHN: Lucky girl. Mom has refused to do anything to my body. But it was blissful anyway.

(across the wall)

TAMAR: Sarah, are you still inclined to lesbian sex?

SARAH: Yes, I am. We've made love earlier this week. Why are you asking me?

TAMAR: Because I told Jane that she couldn't make love with me, since I am her mother, but I could talk to a colleague of mine who could become her (paid) sexual partner.

SARAH: You've had a good idea. Actually, I also thought to you when John bluntly expressed her request for sex.

TAMAR: It would end our lifelong dream of seeing our children married - together.

SARAH: The dream is impossible: your daughter is lesbian, and my son is no good to courtship. We now have to control damage, since we haven't been able to raise children who could become parents.

TAMAR: Right, Sarah.

(Tamar grins.)

TAMAR: Sarah, how did your son suck your tits?

(across the wall)

JANE: I'm sorry to say that I'm going to have something you crave and have been denied.

JOHN: My mom's cunt?

JANE: Yes. My mom must be arranging the details with your mom.

JOHN: I'll take your mom too. Mom told me that she would talk about it to your mom. So ... we're even. We can't have what we want, but we're being provided with a good ersatz.

JANE: Did your mom hint to our parents' dream of marrying us together?

JOHN: She did, and warned me that if I sleep with your mother, and marry you afterwards, we all will find ourselves in a dire predicament.

JANE: We aren't going to get married. So your mother's worry is pointless.

JOHN: But I'm curious to learn ... has your mother taught you to express her milk before sucking it? And how?

JANE: I should undress to show you properly. Do help me. My boobs are getting bigger, and I find difficult to unfasten my bra alone.

(across the wall)

(Sarah undresses Tamar, removing her shirt, vest and bra.)

SARAH: That's what I taught my son.

(Sarah wets Tamar's right nipple with her tongue and saliva, then puts her hands on the mamma and massages it from the chest to the nipple, thus pushing milk towards the nipple. As she sees a few droplets going out, she puts her lips on the areola, latches on and begins to suck.)

TAMAR: Wonderful ... you've taught him well ... don't restrain yourself ... I'm your best friend and lover now ... your hands and fingers shall give me no quarter.

(Sarah raises Tamar's skirt, slips her left hand between her thighs, fondles her pubic mound, finds the clitoris and tickles it, while her own mouth is sucking her right tit and her right hand massages Tamar's left mamma.)

TAMAR: Go on, darling, go on ...

(Tamar lowers her own panties, so Sarah can insert her fore- and middle finger into her vagina and stimulate her G-spot, while the thumb keeps stimulating the clitoris.)

TAMAR (moans and squeals).

(Sarah finds Tamar's breast dry, so she changes nipple and hands.)

(across the wall)

JANE (barebreasted): Mom taught me to circle the areola with a finger first, then with the carpus, while the metacarpus fondles the nipple, slowly but steadily until milk comes.

JOHN: Let me do that.

(Jane sits on the bed, while John massages her breasts with both hands. Jane's pupils widen and her breasts somewhat grow in size.)

JANE: John, you're arousing me! This is not a massage for nurses, but for lovers!

JOHN: Your mom taught that massage on purpose. She wanted you to arouse her.

(John keeps fondling her breasts, until milk dribbles out.)

JANE: What's happening to me?

JOHN: You're apparently making milk!

(John collects some milk in his hands, tastes it and hands some to Jane.)

JOHN: Tasty milk, I'd say.

JANE: Real milk ... how is it possible? I'm not pregnant.

JOHN: Could I suck it?

JANE: Of course. I have to get rid of it.

(John latches on to Jane's left nipple and sucks it, while his left hand fondles Jane's right nipple until the dribble becomes a jet. Jane opens her pant's fly and puts her right hand in it; John adds his own right hand to hers, and they both fondle her vulva.)

JANE: Stop fondling the other nipple ... I could put out the Lilliput royal palace's fire with my milk.

(John bends her right breast until he can put her nipple into his mouth, and suck both tits at once. His hands are now free, and he lowers Jane's pants and panties -- with her active cooperation.)

JANE: Incredible, wonderful ... when you're done, eat me, don't just drink my milk.

(When he is done, John makes Jane lay on the bed, spreads her legs, slips his tongue between her labia, and licks her genitalia until he finds the clitoris.

Then he sucks it as if it were another nipple, insert a couple fingers into Jane's vagina until he finds the G-spot, and massages it until she squirts into his mouth.)

JANE (moans and squeals, then says): Poor John, you've made wonders tonight.

(Jane takes John's head, lifts it and puts it on her breasts.)

JANE: Listen to my heartbeat ... it's the way I thank you for what you've done to me. Or perhaps there is another way.

JOHN: There is.

(John sucks some more milk from Jane's tits, fills his mouth with it, puts his mouth on Jane's, and induces her to open her lips to taste the milk.

The first kisses were full of milk; then he takes less and less of it, so he has to push it into her mouth with his tongue, and she has to lick each drop of it from his mouth.

While they are doing that, John and Jane hug, he leans the tent in his pants against her mound, wiggles his hips, so that he may tuck his tent pole between the labia; then Jane opens his fly and draws his penis out.)

JANE: My kingdom is yours. March your troops to the capital city. Conquer my royal palace.

(John's penis energetically but slowly throbs its way in.)

JOHN: Your palace guards are young and gallantly fighting. It will take a lot of pounding to overcome them.

(As John keeps throbbing, Jane's tits spurt milk everywhere, and she moans of pleasure until it is John's turn to come and squeal.)

JOHN: I often dreamt of that moment ... but I never dared ask.

JANE: I thought I were lesbian ... but you've nearly disproved me.

JOHN: What shall I do to your mom now?

JANE (giggling): Make your choice. I'm not jealous. It could be funny to be both your lover and your pander.

JOHN (roaring with laughter): Ok, so may I phone you, "Darling, could you see to it that I may fuck your mother before dinner, and you afterwards?"

JANE: Don't try and do that!

JOHN: That's what I meant: we can't take both parent and child without dire consequences. We have to choose.

JANE: What's your choice?

JOHN: I love you, Jane.

JANE: I love you too, John.

(across the wall)

TAMAR: Thanks, Sarah, for emptying my breasts. Let me return the favor.

(Tamar undresses Sarah completely, and herself; then she makes Sarah sit on the bed, leans to Sarah's left nipple and sucks it, while her own left hand fondles her vulva and her own right hand goes around her back and strokes her right tit.)

SARAH: I'm not lesbian, but your caresses are always welcome. Keep fondling, Tamar.

(Tamar rides Sara's right knee and grinds her mound over it, while Sarah massages Tamar's tits and expresses some droplets of milk out of them.

As Tamar inserts her fingers into Sarah's cunt, her rubbing Sara's knee becomes faster and more energetic, until both women come.)

SARAH: Change tit. This is now empty.

(Tamar does that, and they both eventually come again. They lie on the bed, hug and kiss.)

SARAH: Thanks for the wonderful dinner and after dinner.

TAMAR: You're always welcome.

SARAH: I wonder what are our children doing now.

TAMAR: They must be talking about the latest movie, or scientific discovery.

SARAH: Are you really sure your daughter is lesbian? I've often seen her looking at my son as if she ... were interested in him, but couldn't even admit it to herself.

TAMAR: And I've noticed that she has always been ever too willing to show her gorgeous body to him ... but he was so uneasy about it that he behaved like a taxidermist or a medical examiner.

SARAH: Perhaps, before offering ourselves to each other's children, we should inquiry whether they could match.

TAMAR: It would solve all our problems ... and clear us of the doubt that our profession has scared our children and led them to think that sex is base.

SARAH: If not ... your daughter is really beautiful.

TAMAR: And your son may become a real stud.

SARAH: Perhaps we should dress and retrieve our children.

(across the wall)

JOHN: So, what should we ask our parents, honey?

JANE: To let us live our love story, and if we really match, we should ask them to marry us.

JOHN: Marry ... you're the best woman around, but I'm afraid I'm too young.

JANE: That's why I'm suggesting that we should wait a year ... if we are ill-matched, we'll have discovered by then.

JOHN: Ok. Let's talk to our parents, then.

SCENE 05

(Around the dining table -- John and Jane are sitting there, Sarah and Tamar are coming.)

SARAH: Oh, we've found you. We thought you were in your closet, but it is now empty.

TAMAR: It reeked of ... human milk and semen. How could it happen?

JANE: The milk was mine. I don't know why, but you were right, mom -- I was going to nurse.

SARAH: So the semen was ... John's!

JOHN: Right, mom. You should have become a pathologist -- no bodily fluid may escape your attention.

TAMAR: Could you explain us what has happened?

JANE: For man is fire, and woman is tow - and the Somebody comes and begins to blow.

SARAH: Before the Somebody came and blew, you asked us ... do you still want that?

JOHN: No. If our story lasts, we'd like to get married within a year, mom.

TAMAR: Wonderful! We'll become grandmothers!

JANE: I agree with John.

JOHN: Mom ... while we were catching fire, what were you doing?

SARAH (tittering): Children shouldn't pry into their parents' sex life.

TAMAR: We were doing that out of affection, not for money.

So, don't ask what even the IRS wouldn't ask.

(Exeunt omnes)