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A Dutiful Daughter-In-Law Ch. 01

This story is an attempt to rewrite a story that I had read a long time ago. The other story was written in Hindi and didn't delve into the characters as well but the plot stuck in my mind.

I am making an attempt to write a story from the woman's perspective for the first time; hoping that it turns out ok.

Just like my other stories, please be warned that the story contains very strong cuckold elements. It borrows heavily from mating behaviors and patterns of animal kingdom.

If this is not your thing, please stop offending yourself and move on.


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Chapter 1 - Introductions

Guilt is like a slow-poison that has detrimental effects on your life and relationships. I had been living with guilt for almost a decade; half of my married life. It was a never-ending gnawing feeling that reprimanded, ridiculed, and threatened me all these years. Several times I mustered the courage to speak about my infidelity with my husband but something or the other prevented me from following through. I loved him very much and didn't want to hurt him. While I had cheated on him on a frequent basis, it wasn't all my fault. Strange as it may sound but perhaps this is how he wanted it to happen - almost in the open but still leaving a little subtlety.

I perhaps began this story after delivering our elder son. However, several edits have been made in the past decade due to which the timeline may seem confusing at first. It shouldn't hinder your understanding of my adventurous life though. The dates in Journal have been kept generic to keep things simple and have been observed to keep chronology intact.

My name is Kamini. I am a happily married wife with 6 children living with my husband for the past 14 years. We are Jain's settled in Rajasthan among the baniya community. Both my husband and myself have grown up and lived all our lives in Rajasthan. We are not affluent but reasonably wealthy. My husband, Ashok is a successful businessman and I worked as a school teacher to keep myself occupied intermittently but of late the responsibility of raising a large family has made it difficult for me to work. We have 4 girls and 2 boys. The eldest girl is 12-year-old; after her our elder boy is 10 years old. The younger girls are 9, 7, and 2 respectively while the youngest boy is 1 year old. Ours is a nuclear family now but it started as a rather traditional family living with my husband's parents. Unfortunately, Ashok's mother passed away quite early during our married life. My father-in-law passed away during our 15th anniversary due to a severe heart attack. Ashok has a younger sister, Sejal, who is married to a businessman Jai Singh. They live quite nearby and are practically part of our family. They have two daughters, who are 13 and 10 years old respectively.

Ashok is a great husband and father. It is amazing the amount of love and attention he showers on our children - despite knowing that they are not his. Over the years my degree of confidence in reading Ashok has increased significantly and at this juncture I am quite certain that he is aware of this truth. You may think perhaps he is impotent or has a low sperm count but that definitely is not the case. For long I even suspected that our elder boy was his son - and perhaps he is but looking at it doesn't seem so anymore. We have never openly spoken about this truth but in private we have spoken to each other several hundred times - not by looking into each other's eyes but jotting our thoughts in journals. Only recently I have started keeping my own journal but I have read all of Ashok's journals from the day we were engaged. Our sex life is phenomenal for a couple married for 14 years and people are still amazed that we have 6 children and that I am pregnant with the 7th one that has just started showing. Similar aged couples have sex 1-2 times as week but we did 2-4 times a week and this frequency is low only because of our large family and the time that we have to invest in managing the affairs at home. Why then you may wonder that the kids were not fathered by Ashok? If you had asked me this question even perhaps 5 years back, it would have been difficult for me to answer but now I can. I perhaps understood it a decade ago but as one may have realized it takes a while before you start fully accepting it.

It is just because kids are fathered by alpha male of the family and no one else. That's the rule in the animal kingdom and it is no different in our family. Jai Singh was the alpha male of our families - Sejal's and mine. This perhaps was clear right from the outset in our relationship but perhaps I chose to ignore all the tell-tale signs. At every juncture Ashok ushered me towards Jai Singh - almost subconsciously. He even resisted the urge to copulate with me when Jai Singh was around and involuntarily paved the path for Jai Singh. This happened with such consistency and frequency that I had very little doubt in my mind about his desire to raise Jai Singh's children. Even my currently pregnant state was due to Ashok's desire to have yet another child - of course fathered by Jai Singh. Sejal is not necessarily happy with this arrangement but she shouldn't complain as she was the one who instigated this dastardly affair between Jai Singh and myself. There is an unwritten protocol between the four of us that we deserved private time for ourselves on a frequent basis. At least once a week Jai SIngh and I indulged each other for couple of hours. We definitely utilized other opportunities to be together whenever we all were together - even if that mean heading to Jai Singh and Sejal's bed in the middle of the night. Maybe I am jumping ahead a little. Let me start at the beginning to explain how all this came about; none of us ever intended it to be this way.

Instead of simply narrating the story myself; let me elaborate it from my husband's perspective by carefully sifting through his journals. Even though I wasn't aware of his complicity until after I delivered our second child, it still is the best place to start.

--- Journal Entry ----

January 1988

I can't believe my fate. I finally married to the prettiest girl I met in my life. She is absolutely gorgeous. Tall, quite tall, perhaps a little taller than me, extremely fair and with a voluptuous body. She is not only gorgeous but also sincere, humble, and loving person. It just seems that I met my soulmate.

There was such an innocence in her reaction to my touch. The first time I held her in my arms and planted my lips on hers, she blushed red. Her heart was thumping wildly as she allowed my uneducated attempts at kissing her. The delectable expression when I first mounted her was so exquisite. So, pure and yet filled with lust. The next morning, she could not even look into my eyes directly yet when I took her in my arms and kissed her, she practically melted in my arms.

--- Journal Entry ----

There were similar such entries in that year's journal that described the first year of our marriage. Ashok's descriptions were so pure and kind that even I was enamored by reading his feelings and thoughts about me. Maybe it is appropriate to describe myself for the benefit of the reader.

Coming from a traditional Jain family, I was gifted with fair - rather pale complexion - and beautiful features. Looks were traditionally a very strong trait of our community and I was no different. I was 5' 8", perhaps a little taller for an Indian woman of our times. Most importantly though I was well built for a woman of my age. It was my ample bust that attracted most attention during my college days. My shapely butt, though wasn't far behind. I had my share of Romeo's who confessed their love to me umpteen times. It was not in my upbringing to entertain such proposals from young boys whose fleeting minds hardly rested on any fixed things.

Ashok himself is very good looking. He boasted of a nice mustache that accentuated his facial features very well. He possessed rather frail physique and stood about 5' 6" or so; he definitely looked shorter than me and most of my friends back then even joked about our mismatched duo. There was no reason for me to like him. He was my close friend Sejal's elder brother.

I met Sejal while pursuing my graduate studies. She was few months younger to me but was 2 years junior to me in the college. It was common practice to fudge the birth years to get your kids into school earlier. I was more of a book worm those days and most considered me rather geeky. Or perhaps it was my quiet nature due to which I had very few friends.

Sejal and I became friends in the second semester. After she learned that I was the brightest student in the college, she got in touch with me seeking help with her studies. She was a cute, young, bubbly girl; full of life and energy. She was quite charming; often witty at times but most importantly she accepted me as her friend in a heartbeat. While I was not a loner, I felt that she really understood me. Our friendship grew day by day and by the time I finished my graduation we were best friends.

Sejal jokingly remarked the day I bid goodbye to her, after finishing my studies, "Do you think you could get rid of me that easily?"

We both laughed and promised to see each other in future. My plan was to pursue postgraduate studies and without letting my parents know, I had enrolled myself in one of the colleges. My parents were not happy as they wanted me to get married soon but they relented and let me continue my studies. My happiness, however, was short lived. About a month or so after the college started, they dropped a bombshell that there was a very nice proposition for me and the groom's family was soon visiting us. This is a rather strange, antiquated ordeal that is still followed in India. It is quite awkward and sometimes stressful.

On the fateful day, I was in irate mood. My parents tried to avoid me as much as they could but helped me get ready for the occasion. I wished I could speak to Sejal and vent my frustration. To my utter surprise, she visited us the very same day; just half-hour before the prospective groom was to arrive. My eyes shone and my lips practically grinned as I saw her.

"You won't believe," I complained, "my parents are trying to get rid of me already."

"I know," she replied.

"You do? How?" I asked stunned. Sejal's eyes twinkled and there was a wide smile on her face. I didn't understand but after a brief moment I guessed that perhaps it was Sejal who instigated this.

"Did you do all this?" I asked, practically frowning at her. She laughed uncontrollably. All my nervousness was gone. I felt she was only playing with me but then how could she get my parents to play along. Perhaps she knows the groom and was someone dear to her. Carefully recollecting the details of her family, I remembered that she had an elder brother, who was perhaps 5 years elder to her.

"Wait," I jumped, "are you trying to get me married to your brother?"

"Oh my god," she blurted, "you guessed it!"

We rolled uncontrollably laughing on the sofa. Our parents joined in and learned about the little plan my friend Sejal had orchestrated for me. My initial apprehensions were gone and it was replaced with anticipation. I really wanted to like Sejal's brother as that would mean that our friendship would transform into relationship.

Ashok, Sejal's brother, was very cute and soft spoken. He liked me instantly and while I had some reservations about him, Sejal made me agree to the proposal. Ashok was nice, well mannered, and gentle person. After a few meetings with him, I realized that my apprehensions were completely unwarranted.

Ashok and I were married within the next 3 months and soon my aspirations for post graduate studies were replaced with those of being an ideal wife. It was the year 1988. Our first year of marriage was quite fulfilling. Ashok was a gentleman; took great care of me and always kept my wishes in perspective during his decision making. My in-laws were reasonable and didn't interfere in our marital affairs for the most part.

We lived in a three-story townhouse style building. Our house was in a heavily populated area but we had considerable piece of adjoining land to the building that we eventually converted into a shop. All that remained was a three-story structure with a little bit of land behind that was mostly used as storage. The building itself was in a rectangular shape with length considerably longer than the width. Each floor had three rooms from front to back. The staircase lead to the first room while the access to the third room was through the second room. The bathroom was behind the third room. At the top-floor, the front-room was used as a TV room or family room and sometimes for entertaining guests. The behind-room was our in-law's bedroom with an attached bathroom at the back. The top-floor was newly constructed and hence had an adjoining terrace at the back, right next to the bathroom.

The second-story had a similar construction but the bathroom at the end was semi-open. Essentially, half of the roof was present and half was absent, allowing one to look-down into the downstairs bathroom. Most Indian bathrooms were designed in this manner. The downstairs bathroom had ample light and at one point was used for washing of clothes, utensils etc. but after the construction of the third story became completely concealed except for the open connection between the two floors. The interior room on the second floor was the kitchen right next to it were two bedrooms.

The ground-floor layout was similar but it was largely used for business purposes. We didn't live downstairs in the first couple of years of our marriage. We lived on the bedroom next to the kitchen on the second-story. My friend, Sejal, Ashok's sister lived in the front bedroom on the second story, right next to our room.

The first year of our marriage was a bliss. Due to the relative privacy we had, our nocturnal activities happened every night with alarming frequency. It was practically every night and during weekends even during afternoons. Our sex life was rather mundane and only involved French kissing, fondling each other genitals and intercourse. We had experimented with three basic sexual positions - the missionary, doggy, and the cowgirl. Neither of us tried to perform oral sex on each other. It happened in the second year during my pregnancy.

Sejal, my friend, was now my 'Nanad'. She was extremely fond of me and I was drawn closer to her as well in that year. Sejal was free spirited and soon started talking with me on intimate matters as well. With my background, there was almost no way I would have encouraged her to talk about such intimate topics. It took me a good six months before Ashok and I were comfortable with each other bodies and be naked in front of each other. On most occasions, we would have sex in the dark, except during the afternoons, even then we would draw out the curtains to make it dark.

Gradually Sejal learned about my rather mundane sex life and frowning at it would reject it saying that it wasn't even worthy of being called sex. If the girl can't even take her husband's penis in her mouth what is the point, she would say. There were several such dirty acts that I learned from her first hand. How men loved women who would give blow jobs and swallow their semen or let them splatter her face with semen. How they were besotted with a girl's breasts and would on their very first chance ravage a woman's butthole. I was alarmed and surprised at how much she knew. None of this was something that I heard for the first time but I really didn't believe many indulged in such activities.

Later that year I eventually learned that Sejal had been sexually active for the past 3-4 years with a man who was 10 years elder to her. He was Rajput and came from well-connected and affluent family. She planned to get married to him after her graduation. I had the urge to talk to Ashok about it but thought it would be unwise and would ruin the trust I had earned with Sejal.

One fine day, just couple of weeks before our first anniversary, she broke the shocking news of being pregnant. On top of it she told me that Jai Singh, her boyfriend was refusing to marry her and asked her to get rid of the child.

This happened in 1989.

--- Journal Entry ----

January 1989

Sejal's wayward ways eventually caught up with her. I knew that she was no virgin but now by getting pregnant she had put our entire family to shame. There was so much of difference between Sejal and Kamini. One is a woman full of lust and another an epitome of innocence and purity.

It wasn't right of Sejal to drag Kamini into this but she did. There wasn't any other way of saving herself, perhaps. Jai Singh is not necessarily the best person for Sejal but she did not leave us with any choice. By taking advantage of the situation and abusing the trust of Sejal he has practically raped my dear wife Kamini. There is rage inside of me but I just can't do anything about it. Jai Singh is a powerful man and fighting him is an act of naivety. I couldn't fathom how Kamini could even withstand such an act of violation.

Jai Singh misbehaved with Kamini not just that night but on every opportunity, he had the whole month. Kamini tolerated all his nonsense thinking that it would all end the day Sejal gets married. The truth is that there is no end to it. Jai Singh won't let go of such a splendid privilege that he masterfully earned.

Kamini's sacrifice had finally proved that she indeed was a dutiful daughter-in-law. She had aced the test but I am not sure if I could even pass the test.

May 1989

My dear wife Kamini is pregnant with our first child. Any husband should be thrilled to hear such a news but I doubt if it is mine. It just seems that Jai Singh scored with not only Sejal but also with Kamini. This is no fault of Kamini but it is bitter pill for me to swallow. If Kamini can withstand the lecher's lewd acts then I should be able to muster courage to fight my envy and jealousy.

June 1989

Sejal came over to our place to deliver her first born. The due date is sometime in September. Kamini's due date is sometime in November. When the Dr. told me about it, the first thing I did was to calculate it back to see if the conception date was around our first anniversary. Unfortunately, the math agreed with my initial belief.

Jai Singh visited a few times and as usual misbehaved with Kamini. It just seemed that Kamini would have to entertain him on a more frequent basis.

October 1989

The past few months have been extremely difficult for me. Every day as Kamini's belly swells I can visualize Jai Singh's seed growing in her. Jai Singh has misbehaved numerous times with her in our house. It does not even seem she likes it; if at all I feel she has been suppressing her rage. Yet I sense an inferiority feeling brewing inside of me. The 6' 2" Jai Singh, even though not good looking, was a much better fit for Kamini. I was 2" shorter than her but always claimed to be as tall as her. Kamini's overextended large belly - much larger than expected - all pointed to Jai Singh as the real father.

During the Diwali festival, Jai Singh stayed over at our place for one night. Kamini is in her eighth month of her pregnancy but with great difficulty she handled all the chores at home for Sejal and her husband Jai SIngh. Jai Singh once again took advantage of the situation. The first night was a blur as I was completely intoxicated but the second night I noticed Kamini was missing for several hours in the night. It was common for her to check on my mother but this time I became suspicious and tiptoed to Sejal's room from where I heard loud grunting and moaning sounds of Kamini.

I couldn't believe that beast was fucking my eight-month pregnant wife. Even though his own wife Sejal was quite capable of handling him. Her sounds were unmistakable and quite load for my comfort. Fortunately, my parents stayed on the floor above and were fast asleep.
The sounds that I heard were alien to me. I wondered if it was Sejal at that time but in the morning, it was clear that it was indeed Kamini. Kamini returned to our bed in the early morning at 5:00. She practically spent 4+ hours with him that night. The next morning Kamini woke up rather late on the pretext that she was unwell.

That night left a lasting impression on my mind. There was something surreal about how Kamini reacted that whole night. I tiptoed to the door a few times and every time I heard those moans and sounds that gave unmistaken proof of how much she enjoyed sex with Jai Singh.

November 1989

Finally, after a long wait I finally held my daughter in my hands. She was as fair as a Caucasian and seemed to have all the features of her mother. However, when the Dr. commented on how unusually tall the baby girl was I knew that it was Jai Singh who had scored in the first round.

December 1989

My fate had been sealed by my errant sister earlier this year. My brother-in-law is essentially a cheap thug has taken over my whole family for slaves. Sejal is married into an affluent household but in the process, she has enslaved all of us. My parents are worried about his constant visits to our house on some pretext or another. While they have not suspected anything yet but it was clear that they are worried about his influence on Kamini. On the other hand, Kamini has pushed our sex life into a high gear; the sexual freedom she experienced with Jai Singh had finally seeped into our bedroom. She was adventurous in the second year of our marriage and has now made it a point to initiate sex most of the time. During the first year we had sex perhaps 4-5 times a week but after our anniversary, our frequency must have been at least 7 times a week except for the last month of our frequency when the risk increased significantly. Our routine resumed couple of weeks after our daughter's birth. I had always felt inadequate with her in every regard - my physical strength, height, courage in comparison to her but what made it difficult was my inability to feel her anymore. Ever since she started entertaining Jai Singh - about 2 to 3 times a week - I had already noticed significant dilation in her vagina but now it is becoming increasingly difficult.

Until now, I had resisted writing about my latent desire to see my beautiful wife with another man. Even though I had often refused to accept it, I have learned that I derive pleasure from the affair my wife is having with Jai Singh. A lot of what she is going through is perhaps just our fate but I have realized that she doesn't dislike it. During the whole year subconsciously I gave several opportunities for Jai Singh to spend some private time with Kamini. Sejal perhaps did the same. Initially, it seemed that he was only kissing and fondling her but as he even made her perform oral sex on him, especially when they had very less risk of getting caught. Every time Jai Singh stayed at our place it seems Kamini entertained him by spending few hours with him in the bed. It wasn't until Diwali night that I learned that this was happening.

I have no complaints. Kamini has never ignored me either sexually or otherwise and neither has she ignored her household duties.

--- Journal Entry ----

There were lot of entries in that year. It was clear that Ashok was stressed with whatever transpired between the three of us. It felt a lot better to learn that even though he knew about my infidelity he was able to rationalize it. The fundamental question that I was not able to answer was how he learned about what all had transpired. It seemed perhaps Sejal divulged her conundrum after my encounter with him. I still couldn't understand why Ashok never stopped me; perhaps he was as helpless as I was.

The first time Sejal mentioned to me that she was pregnant and Jai Singh refused to marry her, I suggested that she go for an abortion and forget about him. Sejal was madly in love with him; perhaps even slavishly obedient to him. At his behest, she forced me to meet with him to convince him. We met him in a shady hotel that offered lot of privacy to unmarried lovers.

"Namaste Bhabhi," he greeted me and quickly extended his hand as a polite gesture. He was much older than both of us and I was surprised that Sejal got caught in his trap. He practically towered over both of us, standing 6' 3" with a barrel chest, strong arms and overall a strong build. He was putting on a little bit of weight in his midsection but due to his height it didn't show much yet.

I wasn't used to shaking hands but confidently extended my hand. It was an act of aggression; I didn't want him to think that I was in anyway intimidated by him. He shook my hand and then in an indecent manner he placed his other hand on top of my hand and gently caressed my skin.

"Namaste Bhaiya," I said smiling, trying to hide my discomfort with him. Sejal quickly invited me to sit with him instead of taking the seat herself. I felt awkward but sat next to him. His lecherous glances were piercing me.

"Why are you not marrying her?" I immediately asked without wasting much time.

"Bhabhi I want to but you know it takes time to convince my family - she is not from my caste," he quickly replied.

"You have been having an affair with her for the past 4 years - you didn't think about it then?"

"My god you have been sleeping with a minor, didn't it shame you then?"

There was a smirk on his face and he looked at Sejal with disbelief. Sejal was nonverbally indicating that I tone it down.

"Is she like this always or only in bed?" he remarked to her rudely.

"What?" I blurted in disbelief. Sejal was in love with such a despicable man who could not even respect her Bhabhi. Would he even care for her?

"Look Bhabhi," he said calmly laying his hand on mine that was on the seat next to him. He turned towards and me said, "It started as an experiment; there was no intention on my part to marry her at that time."

"Honestly," he said smiling.

"But I have done very good justice to what she has offered me; if you have any doubt you can ask her, she can vouch for it."

"Stop it Jai," she yelled at him.

"Keep your mouth shut bitch," he hollered back.

"Now Bhabhi," he said looking back at me again. His hand gently massaged mine; for a moment I just froze, not realizing how to react to his audacity. I felt his rough palm skin on the back of my hand. Even though the man seemed like a spoiled brat but it seemed that he had worked in the army.

"Since you are requesting I can give more thought to it. It could be possible if what shall I say - you were kind to me," he said uttering those words ever so carefully. His large hands seemed to coerce mine. As my hands naturally rested on the seat, I sensed him penetrate the natural hole formed by joining the thumb and the index finger with his middle finger. His hands were twice the size of mine so that one middle finger felt like two, trying to stretch that small hole.

I was a lady with pure thoughts but even in matters of lust I had my weaknesses. Until then the thought of sex with other man hadn't even crossed my mind. Sure, the thought of penis sizes did cross my mind and whether it was an intuition or an unfulfilled desire, I felt that my husband Ashok was rather ordinary or perhaps even under equipped when it came to that.

"Bhabhi are you listening?" he asked waking me up from my trance.

"What is that you are proposing?" I asked looking at him directly and rather sternly.

"Let me talk to my parents," he started.

"It won't be easy but with your help and support, I think I can convince them," he said. His hand finally moved from his palm to my thigh. It was too much for me to take and it and perhaps my momentary weakness had emboldened him. I stood up instantly and said to Sejal that we had to leave.

"Oh, Bhabhi what did I do wrong. Please," he urged as if was mocking both of us.

"You keep away from her," I warned her. He tried to stop me by holding my hand again and this time I whisked it away and gave him a tight slap on his face. The noise had startled everyone in the place but without giving any chance to him or Sejal, I dragged Sejal out of that place.

Sejal was extremely upset that I insulted Jai Singh by slapping him. Out of decency, I wasn't able to tell her that in a very lewd manner he was asking me to sleep with him in return. We ignored talking to each other. It was my nature to shut myself when I was upset. However, the following day we had a rather long conversation.

"Bhabhi I know you think you did the right thing by slapping him," she started, "but honestly men don't like such propriety, especially not men like Jai Singh."

As usual I was quiet and didn't try encouraging her in a conversation.

"Look at yourself damn it," she said, dragging me to the mirror, "you are one hot bombshell!"

"Jai was enamored by your beauty and tried to play with you a little - what's wrong with that?"

"Wouldn't a young devar be smitten by beauty of such a beautiful Bhabhi?"

"Not even in sexual fantasies of a teenager?"

"Sejal Jai Singh is a 30-year old man," I retorted. He was 31 at that time; about 11 years elder to both of us.

"He should behave appropriately - just like your brother," I said, "even if he harbors such immoral thoughts he should keep them to himself."

"Kamini wake up - for a moment she forgot that I was her Bhabhi - real men are anything but like Ashok," she said.

"What do you mean?"

"Bhabhi all I mean is that Ashok is not the ideal man - he is just your law-abiding, middle class, plain ordinary man. He has no courage to stand-up to what is not just."

"What?"

"Real men just take what they think belongs to them and do what they feel is just - now I do agree that Jai is rather impulsive; definitely so for his age but I think he couldn't just control his temptation and the fault lies with you."

"Sejal are you okay?"

"A man tried to abuse me and you are taking his side?"

"You want to marry a man who will never be yours - what kind of love is that?"

"Bhabhi you won't understand - you could have chosen any man but you instead opted for the most ordinary man."

"He is your brother and my husband. I won't tolerate you insulting him," I shot at her.

"Bhabhi forget about him and just think about yourself," she said leading me to the bed.

"Do you even know what a real man can make you feel?"

"He can show heaven to you; he can make you understand why god bestowed you with such beauty - it is to pleasure and unite with such men."

"You are so depraved Sejal - is this the Sejal I met," I asked in horror.

"Very much the same Sejal," she casually replied, and added, "although you don't know him very well, I know him and the way he behaved with you it was different. It was as if you belonged to a special class."

"He always treated me as his slut but I think you are special."

"Sejal you are sucked into this vortex and now you are making sure that I am sucked into it as well," I helplessly added.

"Trust me Bhabhi, I have been with this man for the last 4 years and every time I meet him it is as if I want him to mount me."

"That's how sex is Sejal," I countered her in the most assured fashion.

"What do you know Bhabhi?" she quickly retorted in her impudent manner.

"All you have done is slept with one man," she added with indignance.

"Sejal," I shouted at her.

"You are not implying that..." my words trailed.

"Yes, Bhabhi I am saying exactly what you think and let me tell you frankly," she continued.

"I have dated the kind of men that my family would approve of; you know someone like your husband."

"Unfortunately, all of them are nothing but wimps - they don't have the balls to stand up to anything they believe in - in the name of civility they hide their cowardice."

"And don't even get me started on how miserable they are in bed."

"Sejal - what has gotten into you?" I blurted in frustration.

"You have become a rebel - hating your own identity - none of what you are saying makes any sense to you - did he brainwash you?"

"No Bhabhi this is my own realization," she replied with a little bit more composure, "in a highly civilized world there is definitely a place for the likes of Ashok but in the real world where we live - the uncivilized world - brawn matters far more than the brain."

"Brain wise he is not far behind either - at least from a practical standpoint."

"What do you want me to do?" I asked, trying to get her to the point.

"Bhabhi I want you to help me in getting married to Jai and although you dislike him, I think he is the right fit for me."

"Have you thought it through?"

"He is a womanizer first, then a spoiled, rich brat, perhaps has many other vices that you may be not be aware of."

"Bhabhi you have got it all wrong," she started.

"Firstly, he is affluent and even if he wasn't he has the business acumen to prosper. Secondly, he comes from a family rich in heritage and powerful political affiliations. Thirdly, while he is a womanizer and a brat, those are perhaps his only vices. He does consume liquor but in sensible quantities; he doesn't smoke."

"His only shortcoming, if I may call that, is his strong desire to mate with women; he is not the traditional womanizer that you know of. I mean he does dabble occasionally but he is not into prostitutes. So far he has only dealt with young girls like me and a few married women."

"Look at you Sejal, you are rationalizing his bad behavior."

"Bhabhi trust me, I know what I am talking about," she said and continued, "he comes from high-caste, traditionally these traits are perfectly acceptable."

"It's only middle-class people like us who wonder about morality of our actions."

"And while you may imagine him trying to seduce all the women he meets; he doesn't and he rarely misbehaves with them. It is only when a girl or a woman that sparks his interest then he pursues them."

"In my experience of past 4 years with him, he targeted only 3 married women and 2 unmarried girls."

"We talk about it openly - he was not able to score with anyone, unfortunately. One of the reasons he likes me and wants to get married to me is because I understand him and don't interfere with his affairs."

"Ok - you made your point," I interjected, "what do you need from me?"

"Bhabhi you are my ace card, without your help there is no life for me," she said, practically pleading.

"What do you mean?"

"Really - I would have no choice but to commit suicide."

"What rubbish - don't ever talk about such thing," I reprimanded her.

"Jai has agreed to marry me if he gets you in dowry," she said, trying to control her tears.

"What?" I said stunned with his despicable demand.

"Stop crying first," I tried to console her.

"Ever since he laid his eyes on you he is besotted by you," she said sobbing.

"You have no qualms about this?" I asked.

"That he longs for me more than you?"

"No," she responded rather casually.

"You are absolutely gorgeous and there is no reason for me to envy or be jealous of you."

It was a rather innocent admission of how much she trusted and loved me. For a woman to not be affected by such jealousy could only be termed as miracle. Yet there was a deep-seated trust in me and my character. That had melted some of my initial resistance to the idea itself.

"He thinks you look like Reena Roy," she added. This was a huge compliment. A lot of my friends felt the same way at one point or another. She was a pretty actress of yester year and if I were to choose a more contemporary example it would have to be Sonakshi Sinha. I am definitely a slimmer version of Sonakshi but perhaps resembled the younger Reena Roy more closely during those days.

We didn't discuss much further that day. It shook me to the core and I didn't understand how I could help Sejal with her quandary. What seemed like an act of deceit, an abjectly immoral act just seemed like yet another bodily need for her. Sejal tried to convince me again and again over the next several days.

Sejal had intimate knowledge about our sexual life. She knew how many times we made out in a night; on an average, how long our sessions lasted. She even knew if we chose the comfort of darkness or preferred to do it with lights on. She never eavesdropped on us in terms of secretly watching us - it wasn't quite possible - but she had reasonable guesses for almost everything. She could practically write an encyclopedia on our sex life. The most important discovery of hers after carefully investigating my married and sexual life was that I made a very good choice when it came to selecting a husband but a poor choice when it came to lover. Marriage and sex were too distinct needs from her perspective. Marriage was an emotional need or longing for a lifelong partner who understood you and supported you at times of need. Sex was a physical need and a very important one for a woman given that she had the responsibility to give birth and nurse the young. A very substantial investment that was quite disproportionately higher compared to the investment a man made in it.

Sejal argued that when it came to sex Jai Singh was more appropriate match for me. She was willing to bet everything on it if I disagreed with her. She had done the necessary homework to counter every argument of mine. However, the most thumping argument - perhaps a smack on my face - was the comparison of Ashok's and Jai Singh's penis sizes. Sejal to my utter dismay showed me her stash of used condoms that she preserved - perhaps in preparation of this day - to make her point. She had fished out most of Ashok's from the dustbin and of course, she had access to Jai's. To say that there even was any comparison would be actually insulting one's intelligence. Jai's condom was easily twice the size of Ashok's; no matter what you looked at - the length, the girth, the mass, on every dimension he beat him hands down. If one sample could be refuted, she presented half-a-dozen to illustrate her point. His thickness seemed to be the size of my wrist and compared to that Ashok's thickness was perhaps the size of my three - or even two - fingers put together.

All women, whether they agree or disagree, have a universal reaction to such a prospect. It always gets their pussy flowing with lubricating juices in anticipation. This reaction, although far stronger, is similar to the lubrication in anticipation of her very first intercourse. If there was any doubt in mind my body had sufficiently cleared it. My panties were soaking wet; it was as if I was passing urine.

To make matters even worse, Sejal presented fresh evidence that she collected from that afternoon's episode. The specimens were about 2 hours old. Jai's semen filled the condom up to practically the level at which his penis's knob would extend. Ashok's barely even overflowed the tip of the condom.

Those indelible images stayed with me throughout my life. Such a stark difference between genital organs was unimaginable; true I believed they came in different sizes but the difference wasn't that huge in my mind.

Sejal had thought through this carefully. She reasoned that I would be doing it to save her life and family's honor so no one could blame me of adulterous behavior even if it came out in the open, which she never thought would happen.

There was a lot she left out but she told me in no uncertain terms that once Jai had mated with me, he would not let go of me. I would forever be his slut. What was even more profound that I wouldn't have anything lesser than that myself after tasting sex with him.

My mind was in siege after Sejal planted the seed. All of Ashok's inadequacies were in plain sight. He was ill-equipped, perhaps 4 or 4 ½ inches when fully erect, he hardly lasted longer than 3-4 minutes of actual intercourse. The frequency of sex we were having seemed a lot but abysmally low based on Sejal's descriptions.
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