It's Christmas morning! Sure you're living on your own now, but there's still something exciting about in the air. You're actually a little disappointed when you get downstairs and realize Santa hadn't come. Oh well, a day off is a day off. You've planned a day of pure self-satisfaction, picked out a veritable "pornucopia" and stocked up on lube and Kleenex. You're just gonna sit in front of your nice big TV and pull on it 'till it hurts. Suddenly there's a knock on the door!