Our protagonist was always the one to fail. Failed to do household chores, failed to meet expectations at work or school. Doomed to lead a life of miserable failure

'If only I could be told to do something more fun. Something I'd actually enjoy doing.'

The fates heard the plea. For though they work in mysterious ways, they have for some unknowable reason decided to grant our protagonist this wish. They also know our protagonist very well, and concluded that the best commands should be erotic; they are secretly the rather horny sort of person.

When our protagonist wakes up in five minutes, they won't know anything is different, until the first authority figure they meet tells them to do something odd. It is unknown how they will respond. Will they resist because they feel weirded out? Will they eagerly accept this apparent opportunity to live out their wildest fantasy? Or will they even know they want to do what is commanded of them? Perhaps the fates are equally curious, who knows? Who can know? The point is, you shall have to read on to find out.

Enough babbling anyway. Who have the fates picked?