"Oh, what the hell," you swear, jumping back from the purple smog spewing from the obviously trapped chest. But as you land, your center of gravity feels drastically off, almost knocking you down to the dirt floor of the cave. As you feel something heavy pulling and jiggling at your chest, and you look down at your suddenly naked body, you really do fall down.
You have breasts - quite big ones, at that, easily a DD. And your dick's gone, a tight, virgin pussy taking its place. To say you're freaking out a bit would be slightly understated.
"What the fuck, what the fuck," you hiss, pinching your new boob, sending a sharp shock across your nerves. "Okay, okay, you'll figure this out, you always do Julie, you... wait, what?"
Why'd you just call yourself Julie? The name feels as natural to you as anything else, but you shake it off, "James. You'll figure this out, James." Somehow the name you've kept all your life feels foreign on your lips. Like an insult to your person. Okay, too weird.
Looking around, you can't see anything in the chamber which looks even vaguely helpful for your unprecedented situation. Standing, you wince as your breasts bounce and wiggle as you walk, its mildly uncomfortable bordering on slightly painful. Is this what women really deal with, having breasts? Would having a bra help? Gods, what did you do to have to think about such things?
Deciding you should at least get out of this suddenly fucked up cave, your heart sinks as you turn to find the door you just entered through buried by falling boulders. Of all the damn luck...
Noticing a human-sized hole on another wall, you sigh and head deeper into the already expansive cave. Hopefully Jak, your cunning Periape animal partner, can figure out a way to get to you, since you're suddenly without weapons, armor, cock and balls.
Climbing through the hole reveals a stone antechamber, black moss coating the gray walls, a waist-high marble block in the middle, an iron door straight ahead. On the block are two items, one is a steel dagger, strange, pink runes inscribed on the black hilt. The other is a red, twelve inch rubber dildo.
Meaning to grab the weapon, you feel a sudden warmth fill your body as your hand passes close to the incredibly random sex toy. Biting your feminine lip, you consider grabbing the rubber cock.