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Mom Named Barbie Ch. 10

Chapter 10 - Mom must confess sexual sins to her son

"Ok then, here it is, actually it is a lot of what you said while we were... were having sex."

"Did I say something wrong? Did I say too much? You don't want your lover to be vocal during sex?"

"No, none of that; I have to admit I was surprised how much you talked, I have never had sex with anyone that talked like that."

"I'm sorry, it was too much wasn't it; I promise I won't do it again. That is if you want there to be a next time."

"No, it wasn't that, I said I have never had sex with anyone that talked liked that, I didn't say I didn't like it. As a matter of fact I loved it, I felt like I was in a porn movie fucking a beautiful sexy porn star. I was just shocked by some of the words you used."

She was relieved that he enjoyed the way she talked during sex; she felt he was actually complimenting her, but if he liked it why was her talking bother him so much.

"I'm sorry Jay, I can't help it, I talk really dirty during sex; I always have. I am sorry if I offended you with my explicit language."

"No, like I said I loved it; now let me finish then you can talk, ok?"

"Yes Sir."

"While I love the way you talk during sex, I thought about some of the words you were using. Barbie, my... um... the... um... I can't imagine the old you using words like that, maybe a few cuss words now and then but not the kinds of words you were saying; and you used those words so easily describing yourself. And on top of that you actually seemed proud to describe yourself using those words.

I am also wondering about something else you said... um... you said there was something I didn't know about you, you said you love being a slut and a whore and you love being treated like a slut and a whore, that you love having sex like a slut and whore. Was that just Barbie talking, the um... the new you? Was it just words being said in the heat of passion to add to the excitement, was it just role-playing and you really didn't mean all the things you were saying? Or were you trying to tell me what you want in the future; was it wishful thinking on your part?

Or... or were you serious? If you were serious, how do you know Barbie likes all those nasty things you were saying, Barbie has not been around long enough for you to know what she likes; that is a huge commitment for Barbie to make, for Barbie to live up to. I assume that is the first time the new you, I mean um... Barbie has ever had sex, correct?

Or... were you trying to tell me something else; were you talking about the... um... old you... how you were before Barbie? I was not offended by what you said, I was just shocked you used those kinds of words; I can't picture my mmm... the old you talking like that, especially about yourself.

I guess I'm also saying I am confused, I'm not sure who you were talking about when you said all those things; were you describing Barbie or were you talking about the... um... old you? Because if you were talking about the old you, although I can't see the old you talking like that, if the old you was all those things you were saying; it would explain a lot about the... old you."

Jay was obviously dancing around admitting he was talking about his mom. As his mom she was offended Jay asking questions about his mother's sexual habits, about her conduct before Barbie, frankly it was none of his business. But she had made it his business by what she had said earlier while he was fucking her, and her sexual habits, her uncontrollable libido was one of the reasons she had to rebuild a relationship with her son.

But she was more embarrassed than upset that she had revealed the side of her personality she had always kept secret from her son until now. She had never intended for Jay to discover her secret, to find out the extent of his mother's sexual desires, even though she had hinted at it in the recent past she had never come right out and admitted she enjoyed being a slut and a whore.

It was not something a mom is particularly proud of, although it did have its benefits, Sam loved that she was a slut behind closed doors. Then when she was dating the rich men, while Barbara had not planned on being a whore, she enjoyed the attention and gifts she received by simply doing something the slut side of her personality loved to do. So since she would have let the men fuck her without the gifts and attention she had not pictured herself as actually being a whore until Jay pointed it out the day they had the huge argument.

She felt Jay was forcing her to explain the words she had said, it was true his mom did not use that type of language in her everyday life and had never used them around her son, but it was not unusual for his mother to talk that way during sex. She was beginning to regret having told Jay he could ask her anything, she wished she had included some parameters with her comment placing her relationship with his dad, what she did when she was separated, and her entire sex-life before Barbie off limits. But she wanted to be honest with Jay, she wanted him to feel he could ask her anything and she would always answer his questions as best she could and not lie to him.

Now her secret was out so she might as well come clean with Jay; he was bound to find out sooner or later his mom was also a horny slut; especially considering the way she was dressed and the dangerous game she was playing with Jay by becoming Barbie rather than his mom.

When he paused she asked, "Are you finished, do I have permission to speak?"

"Yes, I'm finished; for now."

"Jay, I want to begin by saying when I told you to feel free to ask me anything, I meant it; I will always answer as honest as I know how; no matter how embarrassing it may be for me or how bad it hurts, I will always tell you the truth. What I am about to tell you is very embarrassing for me, it hurts more than you can imagine for me to have to admit this to my... to you."

She caught what she was about to say, she had almost referred to Jay as her son; even though he is her son she had promised neither Barbara nor his mom would be there that day. It would be difficult but she had to talk to him as Barbie and describe Barbara and his mom as if they were an entirely different person.

"Jay, what I am about to say may be difficult for you to understand; while it describes the way I am now, it also reveals to you the way your mom was when I was with your da...like you said, when I was the old me.

When I... the old me... was married she was the same way I am now, that hasn't changed, she has always been this way ever since your mom lost her virginity to your dad while a senior in high school. Of course Sam married Barbara because he loved her; but he also loved the way she was in bed. It was why they were happily married for so many years; that is until your mom had a mid-life crisis and left her husband, then it became the reason she was able attract the attention of so many rich men; but I digress.

Bear with me for a minute; I need to start at the beginning for you to better understand your mom. You see, she and Sam had only dated a few times before they had sex; they went out for drinks on your mom's eighteenth birthday, at that time legal drinking age was eighteen; and your mom got drunk and the slut side came out. That is why Barbara only drank wine; she knew beer and liquor causes her to lose control.

That is when your dad first discovered the lady he knew in public was a totally different girl in the bedroom. Barbara had an insatiable sex drive and when she was in bed she had few if any inhibitions. There was little she wouldn't do when having sex; I would rather not, not at this time, go into detail about the things your mom has done and would do sexually.

The first time she talked dirty in bed with your dad he kind of freaked out too; much like you he had never experienced such a filthy mouth on a woman. The ironic thing was Barbara didn't say things like that in normal conversation; she always conducted herself as a lady in public; maybe not so much when she was separated, but you get the idea.

You see, Barbara loved sex ever since she lost her virginity to your dad, she wanted to have sex as often as possible and she enjoyed being a slut; and since Sam enjoyed the way Barbara was in bed she saw no reason to change, just the opposite happened, any inhibitions she may have had left vanished during their marriage. For the most part she was able to keep her libido under control when out in public but with your mom having such an open mind about sex it did not take much to bring the slut out in her.

You probably never saw that side of your mom because her husband was careful to avoid situations where she would lose control, especially in front of you. He was always mindful of the places they went and the scenarios they encountered knowing how stimulating erotic environments affected your mom.

Then when your mother had her terrible lapse of judgement and left your dad her libido went with her. As she attempted to regain her youth of course uninhibited sex was big part of her adventure; she did not realize she was a whore until the day you pointed it out to her. She was naïve; she did not make the connection that her willing to do almost anything sexually for the rich men is why they lavished her with expensive gifts and extravagant trips. For Barbara she was being treated like a queen for simply doing something she enjoyed.

So, to sum up what I am saying, your mom has always been a slut, she has always enjoyed being a slut, she was proud to be a slut in bed; and even if she did not realize she was being a whore, the circumstances of being a whore was a satisfying for her. She would fuck like a slut, enjoying the additional benefits she received simply for doing what came natural for her, which made her want to have even more sex thus receiving even more benefits.

So, I hope that helps to explain why Barbie is the way she is. But before I finish I want to tell you something about Barbie that is different from your mom. Under the watchful eye of your dad your mom never did anything risqué in public except for maybe a short skirt above mid-thigh, an extra button unfastened on a top or a semi low-cut blouse and wearing four inch heels. She did not begin dressing more salacious until she was separated; then without your dad to watch over her she did things both in private and in public that she was not particularly proud of.

But Barbie recently discovered how exciting it is to dress revealing in public having complete strangers stare at her in lust simply because she is exposing a little more skin that society considers normal; Barbie enjoys doing it for herself, not to please someone else; unless it is for you. It started on your birthday date with Barbie; she was trying to dress as a girl normally would on a date with you; while it was normal for a girl your age it was much more revealing than your mom was used to wearing in public. Barbie noticed the way the other men were looking at her and it was exciting; you had no idea how much Barbie was turned on that night and was struggling to maintain self-control.

I have a confession to make, Barbie did something very naughty while shopping yesterday; Barbie has vowed to only wear panties when she has to or they are part of the outfit and although she was wearing jeans she went shopping not wearing any panties. She tried on the costume in the store not changing back into her jeans when she went to look for shoes; well, she bent over forgetting how short the dress was and she did not have panties on, a couple behind her saw her bare pussy when she bent over to look at shoes on a low shelf.

Barbie also wore a waist-length jacket yesterday with no bra or top underneath it, the jacket was unzipped quite a ways down her chest. When she went in the liquor store the older man at the register just kept looking down the front of her jacket staring at Barbie's tits; that is when her lack of inhibition took over, and even though she had never done anything like that before she jerked the front of her jacket open flashing her tits at the man.

I... I mean Barbie, loved the attention and would like to dress more revealing in the future, and on occasion in the proper setting, flash her tits, ass and sometimes even her pussy to others. I think Barbie could easily become an exhibitionist.

That's about it, I hope that answers your questions; I think I have told you everything; if you want to know more let me know. I hope you aren't disappointed knowing your fantasy girl Barbie is a slut; I pray you still like Barbie and would like to spend more time with her."

Jay was understandably stunned, sitting quietly as his mind attempted to process the unknown scandalous details he had just been told about his mom. It was not easy to accept that during his childhood his prim and proper mom, whom he had always knew was a beautiful woman, was not the innocent motherly figure he had thought her to be.

"Barbie, are you saying that my mom has been this way my entire life?"

"Yes Jay, I am afraid so. It's not something she is proud of because she would not want everyone to know her secret side; but it's not something she is ashamed of either; not until now."

"What do you mean 'not until now'?"

"Well, it's not the part of a mother's personality she ever wants her son to find out about; but I feel sure she knows that you know about her secret side now."

"Barbie, of course I was disappointed to find out my mother really was a slut and whore, especially the part about her enjoying being a slut and a whore and did not want to change; but the more I think about it, who am I to judge, she was an adult and was entitled to a private life. I mean, I am a guy and I know most guys would love to have a woman like that for a wife or mistress; but where it affected me was when she allowed it to break up her family.

You know, it's ironic though; I can't help but have a feeling of respect for her, for keeping it hidden from me all these years. I know there are things I wouldn't want everyone to know about me and why shouldn't my mom be given that same respect to not want her private life to be open to public scrutiny. I kind of admire her that even after becoming a mom she retained an identity separate from being a parent; just because she was a mother she did not stop being a wife and a sexual person too.

I still can't forgive her for what she did to me and dad when she left, leaving her family to become a whore for all those rich men; that was wrong."

"Jay, what you said about still having respect for your mom after all she has done shows how mature you are; most guys your age would only look at the situation from their side and be mad at their mom. I am sure you understand now, but as you get older you will understand even better what it means to have a public life and a separate private life; there are some things that are no one else's business except for those whom you choose to share those things with.

And, as for you admiring your mother for keeping her private life hid from you as you were growing up, that was an easy decision, it's what a parent is supposed to do; the hard part is actually maintaining a separate private life while still being a parent. Think back to how many of your friend's parents are divorced, that is because once they had children their mom refused to have a life separate from their children. Your mom would be very proud to hear what you said."

"I still can't picture my mom being that way though, saying all those things, doing all those things."

"Jay, I never told you anything your mother actually did; those are details for another time and place if you want to know about them. All I told you is your mother had a private life and her attitude toward sex, which was a secret very few people knew about."

"I don't think I am ready to hear details of my mother's activities. What you have told me so far is a lot to process. Most children live their entire lives never discovering their mother's secrets; much less knowing intimate details of their mother's sex life."

The movie on TV had long been over, neither Jay nor Barbie would have known how it ended had they not seen it almost every Christmas since Jay was born. Another holiday movie had started when they finished discussing his mother's secret side. For Barbie, it was difficult to talk about Jay's mom and Barbara in the third person as if they were not there; but it was impossible for Barbie to share his mom's secrets and not remember them as her own personal history.

Perhaps she had not completely transformed into Barbie as well as she had thought. Barbara had thought all she needed to do was changed the way she looked, convince herself she was someone else and she could easily separate past from present; she had not realized it is practically impossible for a person to become someone else and not be haunted by who they were before.

Of course with her being Jay's mom she personally knew every intimate detail Barbie had told her son. She could not help but feel shame that her son now knew his mom's disgraceful secret of how sexually uninhibited she is. She wanted Jay to say more, she needed him to say more; but she could not make him tell her everything he was thinking. Was he handling what Barbie had just told him about his mother as well as he was acting like he was?

How could any son handle finding out his mother loves to have sex as often as possible, is a slut and has no reservations about being a slut; that she enjoys sex so much she allowed herself to actually become a whore. She could not look her son in the eyes; she began to cry silently. Barbie excused herself to the bathroom to hide her tears; and after getting her emotions under control she returned to the den to find Jay no longer there.

Her cell phone chimed indicating she received a text; it was from Jay.

"I'm sorry Barbie, I needed to go. I will call you."

She cried herself to sleep still lying on the couch; fortunately the day after Christmas was a Saturday and she did not have to go to the office. Her face was swollen and her eyes were puffy, the result of crying most of the night. When she went to the bathroom she looked at herself in the mirror, even though she had just woken up, Barbie, Barbara, or Jay's mom, was confused about who she actually is now, even with puffy eyes and a swollen face a beautiful woman stared back at her; but her attractiveness could not overcome the way she felt; she screamed at the mirror...

"YOU'RE A FAILURE! A FAILURE AS A WIFE, A FAILURE AS A MOM, A FAILURE AS A SLUT, A FAILURE AS A WHORE AND NOW YOU'RE A FAILURE AS A FRIEND!"

Again tears streamed down her face, black streaks from her mascara stained her cheeks. She had such high hopes yesterday would be a success, yet she had ruined it by not being able to control the salacious side of her personality. She felt the only reason Jay would have left the way he did was because he was ashamed of the things he heard about his mother, about her; and it doesn't have to be said, his mother had seduced her son convincing him to have sex with her.

What kind of monster was she? A mom wanting to have sex with her own son, what kind of mother does that? No one could cause her to feel more guilt than she was making herself feel at that moment. She stripped off the revealing clothing and got in the shower trying to wash away the shame. All she accomplished was being clean, the shame and guilt remained.

After the shower she hand washed the outfit, always paying attention to detail she carefully put the alluring costume on a hanger and hung it in the 'whore' room to dry. One last look before she put the costume and accessories away, she was proud of finding the perfect outfit as well as the other necessary items to transform Jay's mom into Barbie, the beautiful and sexy, fun and playful fantasy girlfriend; that she had gotten right.
Barbara spent the day in sweats curled up on the couch under a blanket; she could not stop the tears from flowing. She hoped she would hear from Jay today, but his text only said he would call, it did not say when. She held her phone in her hand all day, waiting to hear the unique tone indicating her son was calling; but her cell remained silent. She went to the refrigerator trying to remember the ingredients in the tropical drink Jay had mixed for her; she hoped to recreate the tasty cocktail thinking perhaps alcohol would ease the pain she was feeling

Looking at the enormous amount of food leftover from dinner the day before Barbara knew she needed to eat, but she was too much of an emotional wreck to have an appetite. Crying was not helping perhaps she could drown her sorrows. One drink became two, two became three, and three became four until she felt sunshine coming through the window warming her face.

She was not sure what time it was when the alcohol had gotten the best of her and she passed out on the couch. She quickly checked her phone fearing Jay had called or texted while she was asleep; her eyes immediately filled with tears again as she realized he had not tried to contact her.

There was no way she could spend another day in her apartment alone wallowing in self-pity, she showered and dressed deciding to go for a drive with no particular destination in mind. As she was getting dressed she felt disgust with Jay's mom every time she looked in the mirror, all she saw was the monster she believed herself to be. She felt such disdain for Barbara she could not tolerate looking at herself.

She went into the 'whore' room and positioned the auburn wig on her head, she was not trying to become Barbie; Barbie was Jay's fantasy girlfriend and after not hearing from him in over a day and a half the last thing she wanted to do was become Barbie. No, all she wanted to do was be someone else besides the terrible woman that had ruined so many lives with her selfish actions and not being able to control her sexual cravings.

Barbara drove for a few hours then stopped for a cup of coffee at one of the same 24hr chain breakfast restaurants she and Jay had eaten at when it was snowing. She repeated this scenario stopping for coffee three more times, and although it was still early evening she was too far from home to drive back considering she had not eaten and spent most of the last two nights crying; exhausted she took the next exit pulling into a motel.

As she finished checking in and headed toward her room she noticed a bar adjoining the lobby. She remembered a sign at the front desk offering complimentary toiletries for guests who may have forgotten theirs at home; the clerk handed Barbara a toothbrush and toothpaste across the counter along with a sample size container of deodorant, she went to her room and showered.
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