“Hello, and welcome to the afterlife! Someone will be with you shortly to discuss your new state of being.”

I was floating on a pedestal along with hundreds of other floating lights, each a different shade or shape of human on their own pedestal. One by one they would randomly be pulled into the ceiling, only to be replaced by a new soul. Then it was my turn. I was sucked into a swirling tunnel with many twists and turns, I would be dizzy and nauseous if I still had a body, then deposited in some sort of cubicle. I was sat in a chair in front of a desk with what appeared to be an angel sitting on the other side with a bored looking expression on her face looking at an open file folder.

“Well, lets take a look at your life young lady. Died at twenty. A rather embarrassing death I see. Dorm room ceiling collapsed while pleasuring yourself with a personal vibrator. The rescue workers found you with it still stuck inside you. He-he"

If I still had a body, it would be red all over.

"You led a rather bland life. You seem to be right on the line, which is extremely rare. The last case was over eight decades ago. Wow!" she said with bit more emotion. "Let's see...normally your soul would be reincarnated since you are not eligible for Heaven, and you are too good for Hell."

She then started typing on what I thought was a computer that only she could see.

"Looks like you have a job waiting for you in soul procurement. Well, time to send you on your way! Azrael doesn't like to be kept waiting. "

Then I was sucked back into the tunnel of light.