Frank Milfenstein was born in Wisconsin in the year 1969 and raised there with his family. He was the son of Alphonse Milfenstein and Caroline Beaufart, who died of syphilis when he was 17. He describes his ancestry thus: "I am a father's son, having left my mother's ample utters of milk when I was 14!".

Having grown up without maternal support in the house Milfenstein soon grew up into some sort of jerk, lusting from skirt to skirt but never scoring too high...

Soon Milfenstein took on the antics of a mad scientist, trying everything to get closer to women. Figuratively and quite literally he tried to get into their pants...