Spring Onion Stories

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Unexpected Love Ch. 01

by uluvERD2000 on Sep 16, 2017
Romance

When I woke up this morning, the sky was gray and rain was falling down onto the pale landscape of Norwood Ohio. Ohio is one of those states where you have no idea what the weather is going to be like. One day it's like sunny California, and the next day it snows, and then the next day it pelts out rain that makes you think you're living in a black and while...

A Tail of Onions

by foehn on Sep 17, 2017
Non-Erotic

There's an old saying, truth is stranger than fiction, and my friend Josh is pretty strange. He has an onion plant growing in a flowerpot in his apartment. It's huge. It looks very old and bedraggled, and has something that looks like an old pocketknife sticking out of the dirt. You can just barely see it underneath all the onion leaves that got cut off or d...

The Wolves Ch. 034

by Exigaet on Mar 2, 2020
Sci-Fi & Fantasy

Earth Adventurer's Guild HQ, Ottawa August 16, 2019 18:40 EDT There were many black SUVs in the parking lot so I was glad the headlights turned on when I hit the unlock button on the key fob. Escorting Tessa over to it, I opened the passenger door for her before walking around to the other side. After starting it up I got my first surprise of the evening...

The Prophet

by HughMungus1 on Jan 21, 2020
How To

From the darkened confines of swinger Hell, I discerned the cantaloupe-colored glow of the Prophet's fire stick. Sentient shadows traversed the carpet-covered walls of the aging van. Fake fur the pigment of a cheerleader's bubble gum lined the star-shaped, vibrating bed. On a television more obsolete than dial-up modems, a white guy with a perm bent a black...

Cooking with the Monkey

by RedMonkeyButt on Sep 1, 2017
How To

I've never really been one to make a huge pot of stew and have it sitting in my fridge for a week. If I'm going to cook a lot of food for a large party of guests, though, I do like to go all out. For the purpose of this little How-To, I'm going to walk you through the makings of an entire Tex-Mex meal. Note that I said Tex-Mex, not Mexican. I do not live in...

Mad Dog - First Strike Ch. 03

by crimepunk on Jul 13, 2020
Novels and Novellas

3 - Dirty Pictures: "What the fuck!" VJ spat. "Paper jam? PAPER JAM! What's it mean paper jam? There's no paper jam because there's no sodding paper in sodding machine! I mean, that's what I was trying to do, load the bloody paper." "You all right?" I ambled over to him. "I swear, one of these days I'm gonna smash this load of shite to pieces!" He snarle...

Parasols Magazine - Cooking for Two

by JimBob44 on Sep 14, 2017
Erotic Couplings

*Author's Note: Any and all persons engaging in any sexual activity are at least eighteen years of age. ***** Valerie Elswell, Editor In Chief of Parasols magazine was watching her favorite soap opera when an extremely annoying commercial began. She switched the channel and happened across 'The Cast Iron Stomach,' a cooking show on Channel 12, a local inde...

Arcanum - Of Steamwork and Magic Ch. 20

by DragonCobolt on Apr 23, 2019
NonHuman

February 22nd, 1886 I was nearly fifteen yards from the entrance of Quintarra before Raven dropped from the trees to land before me. Normally, I would have been impressed by the natural grace of an elf in her element – let alone the beauty of Raven herself. But this was not an ordinary day. Virginia had vanished into her own teleportation spell, leaving me...

Mr. Music Please

by ReverendAnimal on Sep 17, 2017
Non-Erotic

I wasn't there myself, but the story was all over town... About the time that the plane crashed into Empress Chili and the Ninja Twins went on their killing spree at the Lucky Star, Mommyrot who had been playing at the Plexiglass Onion mysteriously lapsed into My Name is Bocephus by Hank Williams Jr., which in turn lured Santa Claus and countless other innoc...

Knife Lessons

by thegirlingray1 on May 12, 2020
Celebrities & Fan Fiction

It was a different sight to see Ivy sitting in between both of them during a show. She smiled as she looked at the camera, "You don't want to miss what we have next for all of you. It is very special for long time fans. I get to show Link how to actually use a knife." Link smiled even more as he heard the mention of a knife, but he also smiled at the thoug...